Hello, my name is Hannah and I’m a sugar-holic.
I have fallen off the wagon, rolled in to a ditch, and been eaten alive by raccoon (which I just learned is the plural of raccoon). What I’m trying to say is- since my cleanse, I haven’t been doing so well. My first week off I maintained my healthy eating habits really well, but the last two weeks have been……. bad. I won’t go into the embarrassing details of what I’ve eaten.
The results of my bad eating:
- Break outs
- Stomach aches/bloating
- Sluggish/ Can’t focus
- Sleeping poorly
- Dehydrated/ dry skin
- Crave sugar/food all the time
I am eating waaay more food than I need to and I literally feel my digestive system saying “WTF are you doing JUST STOP EATING”.
I’m not going give up. I won’t call myself a failure and tell myself “I told you so” because I thought this would happen. From what I’ve learned, dealing with food addiction is just as challenging as drug addiction. I have to admit that I simply cannot have just one cookie, piece of candy, bite of ice cream, sip of coffee.
I just can’t. And I know that fact before I bite into whatever sinful food I want, and I know that it will make me angry at myself.
The book I mentioned during my cleanse, The End of Overeating, really emphasized the fact that people who have issue with overeating cannot attempt moderation. Especially in the beginning. After 30 days of 100% clean eating, I had my first coffee. And then my first cookie. And then I spiraled out of control. BUT THAT’S OKAY because I’m going to keep going and get back on track.
2 Reasons why Clean worked so well for me:
- Strict guidelines on what/when to eat
-Meaning no guess work: Can/Should I eat this? Will I hate myself for eating this? (yes) Am I hungry? (no)
– I actually thought about food less when I was on the cleanse because I had an immediate response to any food question in my head. These last two weeks I’ve been thinking about food nonstop and I hate it.
- Boundaries of when it is appropriate to eat
-In most cultures (not America), it isn’t appropriate to eat. all. the. time. Meetings, bars, parties, sitting at your desk, in between meals, etc. Having that automatic internal boundary that tells me- Hey, you’re working right now, it’s not time to eat- keeps me from stuffing my face when I’m bored.
So, I’m moving on from my bad decisions and starting fresh.
This week I will post daily with the meals I’m making and keep myself on track. My next post will be a couple of meals and snacks I’ve made so far.